Kids say and do the darnedest things and their impact on our lives is remarkable. I've had no greater perspective than that which comes new each morning since Lyvi Lou (and then rest of the crew) made her triumphant appearance. The joy, the laughter, the hard work, the choice to put my needs after others, the real struggle, the truest love, the very best memories. Having walked with my father for years I was completely shocked and overjoyed to realize the love he had for me. A love that I couldn't fully grasp until I had the same for my own children. How much greater the grace he gives became evident to me. In the littlest of moments and in all the ways I continue to be forgiven I'm overwhelmed by the generosity. His great ability to see the finished component, the true potential, above all the muck and mud that occur day in and day out.
On Wednesdays the brood heads over to our local church and attend AWANA while we have a chance to spend time with other parents who are also on the greatest adventure of all! In these moments in reminded of the responsibility to love our kids endlessly, to pursue true relationship, to serve them and hope they choose to serve others, to forgive, to fight, to resolve and restore, to define true success...
Our culture doesn't want the same things we want for our kids. Interest is divided and success is measured by status, wealth, academics, and popularity. To this point I have to admit I often define my own worth according to the same guidelines. The comparison, competition and need for control leave me tired. Hoping and longing for my children to have a different definition, one that brings life and love in the fullest way possible. And processing this desire I can't help but think I have the privilege to influence their definition. The opportunity to model true success and define a legacy.
In our discussion last night a comment was made that we all create a legacy but some last and others die alongside the owner. It's a sobering reality. So what do we want to be known for? How do we define success? What can we start doing right now that will impact our vision?
In the end I want my kids to tell stories of our lives together. Of the most real moments, the honest victories, the true realities. Of fun, abundant laughter, peace in the face of pain, dependence on the Father. Of love that overcame and joy that welled up inside. I want my kids to say I was authentic, honest and willing to get my hands dirty. It's a grand vision which requires strength I often don't feel ready to muster but I'm dedicated to it. I was recently asked "when you look out are you looking into a mirror or through a window pane". I want to look out the window, I want to see the needs of others before my own. I want to show up ready to help and willing to live out true love. I want my kids to make the same decision in their own lives and recognize the true greatness we were created for, the story of full restoration that we've been invited to scribble a few pages in. I want to live a genuine life.
